Keegan Michael... Ninja Puker

Keegan has been a little "under the weather" lately. Sometimes I like to use random quotation marks. Every time I do you can be assured that I am actually stopping to "quote" wiggle my fingers because it "makes me smile". Ok- back to the point. Monday night he was up for most of the night. I know this because I was there, with him, all night. He was just fussy, and I could tell his stomach hurt, but that was it. Then the next morning he ate breakfast and all seemed right with the world. Tuesday afternoon I was eating lunch with a girlfriend when I got a call from Carly, who had agreed to watch Keegan for me. It went something like this: "ANDI, YOU NEED TO COME HOME RIGHT NOW BECAUSE KEEGAN IS PUKING. AND I MEAN A LOT. LIKE ALL OVER THE PLACE. ON THE CARPET AND ON ME AND ON THE FLOOR AND ON THE DOG AND....". Ok, so I made up the on the dog part. But you get the drift, and so did I.

As I was trucking out of Subway (God bless you, $5.00 foot long) I got a call from Mom's house again. This time it was Momma: "And you need to get some pedialite, because he is puking all over the house. Really." So now I am really feeling like a tool for leaving my sick kid with my mom so that I could catch up with a friend over the new chicken pizziaola (totally not what I wanted it to be). In my defense-- he was fine that morning. Really, I swear. And my friend, who is currently pregnant with her first, was looking more than a little intimidated about the quantity of puke that was being portrayed, and quite frankly, so was I.

So long story short (too late) K-Man is sickly. Though last night he slept fine, had some "runny diapers" if you get my drift, last night and today, and slept most of the afternoon. He woke up with a fever and dozed in and out the rest of the evening. Finally he woke up and was playing, all seemed well, and I'm thinking we were in the clear. I think this is what he WANTED us to think. That we were safe from the vomit. That we could hold him with no fear of reprisal. Oh-ho, he was so sneaky, because as I scooped him up to tell Jacob goodbye for the evening Keegan proceeded to projectile vomit all over me, all over the floor and all over himself. I was truly in awe of the amount of bile that this little kid produced. It was by far the most vomit per human size I had ever witnessed in my entire life, including parties in my not-so-proud-of past where there may or may not have been "a lot of drinking".

So now what? Who knows? I do know that I am almost out of Pedialite, but that may be ok because at this point I'm not sure I'll give him anything. So far Sophie seems to be feeling well, I even asked her today if her belly hurt, and she said no, but made sure I knew that the ouchie on her hand still hurt. Hopefully this will just pass her and everyone else by. Fingers crossed, kids. Fingers crossed.