Been Away
To my momma's house, not to worry, all is well in Andi and Jacob land, I haven't packed up and left him. But the lactation consultant said if I was ever going to get my milk supply up where it needs to be then I had to sleep. "Isn't there anyone at home who can get up with the baby at night?" she asked. No. Not anymore anyway. So off I went to Mamaw's house, who has stayed up now for 2 nights with her for me to sleep. She's pretty great like that.
How is nursing going you ask? It is the hardest thing I have ever done. And I was getting so worked up about it that I wasn't having a good time being a mom. I was just so gosh darn frustrated that she didn't want to do what I wanted her to do. Then I was getting resentful that it was taking up all my time. It takes her about an hour to nurse, then I have to pump for 15 minutes, then I have 45 minutes to sleep, pay bills, clean, eat etc... before she is due to eat again. Then I realized- I don't have to do this- not this way. Not to where I am not enjoying my daughter anymore. That wasn't fair to either one of us. So I quit being so anal about it, which is a big chore for me, not being anal. So if I don't feel like sitting down and nursing, she'll have a bottle. If I feel like nursing, we will. We'll do this until she decides she doesn't want to mess with me anymore, and that will be okay too. I mean as soon, AS SOON as I decided this, I felt 100% better. So far it is going great, we are both a lot less stressed out, and I can finally feel some of that "joy of breastfeeding" instead of the "dread of having to breastfeed again when I just got done 15 minutes ago and she's hungry. Again."
Patricia- keep this in mind when the time comes for you, and it will.
Children are to enjoy. I was making mine a burden. So I apologised to Sophie for being too stubborn to admit defeat and we are moving on. It feels great.
I was able to post a picture of Wes and Sophie at Momma's house - not sure why I can't from mine. Still working on this problem.
2 comments:
i love your honestly in all of this. it's beautiful, actually. it might not seem like it to you, but it is.
i'm so glad you're able to step back and do what's going to be best for both of you. and i can relate to being anal (for me it's bullheaded stubbornness) about something.
i'll keep all of your advice in mind, with hopes that i get to use the wisdom some day :)
Andi, there's a really good book that was recommended to me "eons" ago when I had my 1st one (she's now about your age - she's 23). I don't recall the exact name of it but it's by the same author as "What To Expect When You're Expecting" only it's about newborns. It talks about nursing & what to eat & not to eat to bring your milk supply up (probably one of the main reasons she's wanting to nurse so often - she's not getting enough the 1st time).
Also, if she tends to do what my girls did & fall asleep while nursing a little thump on the foot will wake her up & it won't hurt her at all. Oh, the same goes for when she's teething & nursing (only instead of the foot it's the nose). Both my girls learned not to "bite" when nursing using that method.
Good luck, it's hard when things don't go "as planned". I remember.
Post a Comment